The Loser's Club Part 11 - Ernest P. Worrell vs. Team Rocket

[SSJRuss]

The Loser’s Club

Part 11

Previously -

Part 5

 

 

–Cleaning Crew Office, Common District, Verse City

 

Mokap, once a combatant in Mortal Kombat, was deep in thought as he rolled a set of dice in his hand. His eyes flicked between his DM Screen and his players, Haru, a fellow martial artist, and Satoru (better known as the hero Mumen Rider).

Haru drummed his fingers impatiently on the other side of the table. Mumen Rider tapped his pen on the small notebook he used for each session of Dungeons & Dragons they played. This was their fifth session and things were really beginning to heat up... narratively speaking.

Haru leaned forward, his eyes fixed on Mokap and face intense. "Come on, man! Roll the freaking dice! We've been sitting here forever."

Mokap grinned. "Patience, grasshopper. A good Dungeon Master must take his time. Besides, are you in such a hurry to die?"

Mumen Rider chuckled from the side of the table. "My character is an eighth-level paladin, she can handle anything you throw at her."

Mokap raised an eyebrow. "Is that so? Well, let's see if she can handle this." With a flourish, he finally rolled the dice behind the privacy of his DM screen.

“Oh boy…” Mokap said, creating an eerie silence in the breakroom of Cleaning Crew Offices. Haru and Satoru’s gulps of nervousness seemed to echo.

“So here’s what you see…” Mokap described a fierce dragon descending upon the players, its massive wingspan blotting out the sky. It was a dragon that could spew poison from its breath. And poison was one of the few things that Haru and Satoru’s characters lacked effective counters for.

Haru leaned back in his seat and looked to Satoru, "Oh, man, we're in trouble. I don’t think my Badass Ninja Sword will do a lot of damage to a dragon."

Satoru flipped through his notebook until he found what he was looking for, "I might just have a spell for this situation."

“Roll initiative, boys,” Mokap said.

As the group picked up their dice, they were suddenly interrupted by the sound of the break room door opening. In walked their boss, Mr. Clean, followed closely by the superhero Feedback, another ‘co-worker’ or ‘member’ of Clean’s Clean Up Crew.

All it took was a raised eyebrow and crossed arms for the boys to put away their D&D game. This didn’t seem like the time to be passing the time between operations. Perhaps there was a development?

“Sorry boys, were we interrupting something important?” Mr. Clean asked.

Mokap stood up, his respect for his boss evident in his demeanor. "No, sir, we were just playing a game. What’s going on? I thought Feedback was on recon?"

Haru stood at attention as well, but scoffed under his breath, “Know it all.”

Mr. Clean's expression was grave as he glanced around the room. "He was. But he finally has something for us. Unfortunately the news is what I expected, and the true reason I’ve hired you all here in the first place. Feedback?” 

Feedback cleared his throat, then spoke with a firm tone, “I can confirm the worst. The GCGBT, under the rule of Vince McMahon and his ‘Commission’, have been invading and subjugating worlds across the multiverse right under the noses of everyone. They’ve been doing this since the first tournament, maybe even before that.”

The room fell silent as the gravity of the situation sank in. Haru leaned forward, his eyes narrowing. "I knew that guy was up to no good. Never trust a wrestler, am I right? I mean… what do we do now?"

Feedback answered with firmness, "We need to act. What he is doing spits in the face of fairness and justice. We have to find a way to stop him before another world becomes enslaved."

Satoru perked up as the mention of justice, "Agreed! We should get the Verse City Crisis Units involved right away."

Mr. Clean held up a single hand, "Nevermind them, Satoru. Vince has gone about this in secret but I’m willing to bet he’s bankrolled most of the power players in Verse City. That was why I found my own recruits to begin with. Those of us in the Clean Up Crew can be the only ones we trust to act.”

“But Mr. Clean,” Feedback said, “I know everyone isn’t here in attendance but surely we don’t have the man-power to liberate all of these worlds ourselves.”
“That isn’t all though,” he continued, “Our neighbor, Bowser, has been up to something as well. I don't have all the details yet, but he is certainly connected to the GCGBT. Not to mention I can confirm it was his men that are responsible for Ernest’s disappearance."

The group exchanged worried glances, knowing that they were facing a serious threat. But they were also determined to do whatever it took to stop these villains.

Mokap spoke up, his voice calm but resolute. "We'll do whatever it takes, sir. We won't let these villains win."

Mr. Clean gave a small smile of approval. "I knew I could count on you boys. It’s showtime. Satoru and I will head to one of these worlds under siege and see what we’re dealing with. Hell, if we’re lucky we might get some allies out of this and learn some more about what McMahon’s strategy is."

“As for the two of you,” Mr. Clean pointed at Haru and Mokap, “I have a lead on what may have happened to Ernest. I need you to follow up on that, as well as look for a few missing competitors from the tournament today. Based on what Feedback’s told me, the losers of the tournament are not being sent back to their homeworld, but being held captive by McMahon. It’s likely how he’s chosen what worlds to invade next. Anyway, he missed a few and they’ve been spotted running wild in the city. I need you to find them and bring them here.”

The two nodded, then dispersed the room along with Satoru, ready to get to work on being heroes.

“I’m going to-” Feedback started but was cut off by Mr. Clean.

“What I need you to do is lay low, Feedback. You put yourself on the line just to get us that intel and I fear the GCGBT may have caught on. I don’t want to put you in that kind of danger again so soon. For now, keep an eye on the tournament. The semi-finals should be closing soon and it would be wise to know which of the combatants are the losers. Their worlds will be in danger too, if not already.”

Feedback bit the inside of his cheek but couldn’t help but speaking out, “I understand that, but if McMahon is behind this, then shouldn’t we confront him now? If we stop him, then we’ll be saving every world–”

“That was an order, Matthew. Keep to the damn shadows. We’ll talk again when I return.” Mr. Clean left the break room, leaving Feedback alone and forcing him to swallow that hard pill.

______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

–Mushroom Kingdom

“You said you were a truck driver?” Shrek asked Ernest, munching down on another toasted mushroom.

The two had managed to make it to the castle and fend off the strange mushroom creatures. Turns out they were pretty easy to deal with… and tasted great when cooked. They also had a run in with Bowser’s son, Junior. Ernest provided a great distraction during the conflict, giving Shrek plenty of time to knock Junior’s head loose. Shrek had fully intended to only knock him out then ask him questions once he woke up. Questions like, “How do we get out of here?” and “Why is your father a piece of crap?”. Unfortunately, Junior had made a quick getaway with help from his minions.

Regardless, Shrek and Ernest were no worse for wear. And they could settle in this swanky castle while they figure out their next move. (a.k.a. Find a way out of here and back home)

“Yes, sir, indeed-y,” Ernest said, munching on his own once-living mushroom. “I was a truck driver extraordinaire. License to leave the Forgotten District and roam the b-e-a-utiful streets of Verse City and its many parts. Yes sir, I made deliveries all around that town. Made some wonderful friends and for the first time in a long time I felt right at home.”

“Okay I get the point,” Shrek said.

“But that was only the latest entry in my journal of life. This story starts much much earlier, Vern. There I was. Given the golden opportunity for a fresh start in a new life. Life outside of the Forgotten District. It happened like this—”

___________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

–Ernest’s FLASHBACK

 

It was one heck of a night. I was behind the wheel of ol' Big Bertha, my trusty delivery truck for the Multiversal Postal Service (MPS), chuggin' along down a dark highway. The night was quiet, 'cept for the rumble of the engine and the occasional owl hootin' in the distance. I was just minding my own business, making my usual rounds, when all of a sudden, trouble came knockin'.

I caught a glimpse of somethin' in my side mirror, movin' around like a critter in the bushes. Before I could figure out what was goin' on, BAM! The whole truck shook like a leaf in a windstorm, and I nearly lost control.

"What in tarnation?!" I shouted, white-knucklin' the steering wheel.

I brought Big Bertha to a screechin' halt and peered out into the darkness, and that's when I saw 'em. Three shadowy figures, steppin' outta the night like ghosts.

"Prepare for trouble!" one of 'em hollered.

"And make it double!" another one chimed in.

Now, I ain't the kind of fella who scares easy, but I'll admit, I was feelin' a mite nervous at that point.

"What in the Sam Hill are you varmints doin' in my truck?!" I demanded, tryin' to keep my cool.

"We're on a mission to catch rare Pokémon, of course!” one of 'em declared.

Well, that caught me off guard. Pokémon? In my truck? Ain't that a hoot.

I told 'em straight up, "There ain't no Pokémon in my truck, I delivered the last of ‘em last night!"

But they weren't buyin' it. Next thing I knew, they were comin' at me, claws out and ready for a fight.

I didn't back down, though. Oh no, not me. I jumped outta that truck and went toe-to-toe with 'em, fists flyin' and voices raisin'. It was a real donnybrook, I tell ya.
 

 

Ernest VS Team Rocket (including Arbok and Victreebel).

Team Rocket wins if they subdue or kill Ernest. Or if they manage to get away with the delivery truck.

Ernest wins if he can successfully get away with the delivery truck or make them submit.

[Callisto]

Learn More About
Ernest P. Worrell
Read more about Ernest P. Worrell at Wikipedia
Official Site: The Estate of Jim Varney Links: Wikipedia IMDB: Ernest Goes to Camp TV.Com: Hey Vern, its Ernest!

Team Rocket
Read more about Team Rocket at Wikipedia
Official Site: Nintendo Links: Wikipedia Entry Pokemopolis' Team Rocket page Pokemon's Official Site

[SSJRuss]

So... it has been a year since my last match here. An even longer time since we've seen Shrek and Ernest. Hope y'all enjoy. I might post a few more matches so stay tuned and hope you all enjoy!

[JohnnyChany]

Good to see you again making matches, SSJRuss. I've got Ernest fumbling his way to victory.

[Venom 2009]

I like the match and give the setup a 5.0.

[Callisto]

Match Final Results

Member Ratings:
4.70 - JohnnyChany
5.00 - Venom 2009
4.40 - Boratz

FPA Calculation:
3 Total Votes cast
14.10 Total Combined Score
14.10 / 3 = 4.70 Final Rating on the match

MATCH SCORE
Ernest P. Worrell: 3
Team Rocket: 1

[SSJRuss]

A win for the Ern-ster!