Match 21386 Laurie Strode vs. Sarah Connor

[JohnnyChany]

FINAL GIRL FACE-OFF

Bonus Match # 7

 

 

SIDNEY PRESCOTT VS. ERIN HARSON RESULTS

 

The USCSS Nostromo was dimly lit and reeked of old oil and cosmic decay. Alone and stalked by a xenomorph, Sidney Prescott moved cautiously through the vessel with a pulse rifle slung over her shoulder. Every creak, every hiss of the ventilation system sent a jolt down her spine. Sidney was no stranger to being hunted, but this was unlike anything she had ever faced.

Meanwhile, Erin Harson had taken a more methodical approach. She raided the Nostromo’s engineering bay for parts. With swift ingenuity born of desperation, she began crafting traps, flamethrowers rigged from old tanks, tripwires using frayed cables, and explosive decoys fashioned from pressurized coolant canisters. It wasn’t elegant, but it was deadly.

Sidney continued her trek. She had been hunted before, but nothing like this. First came the hiss. A dark shape dropped from the shadows above, its claws slashed at her. Sidney grabbed a nearby hanging chain and swung it at the xenomorph. The alien retaliated with a tail swipe that cut across her back. Sidney screamed; she fired wildly. The xenomorph swiped and slashed at her, it knocked the rifle from her hands. Sidney barely dodged its inner jaw with each roll and kick. Finally, she plunged a utility knife into its neck and scrambled away. Acid blood ate through the floor as it leaked out of the monstrous alien. Sidney was bleeding, she limped into an adjacent corridor with her shoulder shredded.

SIDNEY: God…damn it…

Erin heard the screeches and gunfire echo through the ship. Her grip tightened on her weapon. It was time to strike. With the sound of her boots on metal, she lured the xenomorph into a cargo bay. Erin watched from an air vent above as the alien entered. A canister clinked, and the xenomorph triggered a wire. A pressure valve exploded and knocked it sideways. The xeno shrieked. Erin dropped from above.

ERIN: Die! You son of a..

Erin attacked with a jury-rigged spear and stabbed the creature. It shrieked again and thrashed, knocking her aside. But the alien stumbled into another trap, a fuel pipe ruptured and ignited it in flames. 

ERIN: Burn!

Erin picked up a loose pipe and slammed it into the xenomorph’s skull. It writhed in burning oil and finally collapsed dead.

A decent distance away, Sidney wiped blood off her face and leaned against the wall, ignorant to the end of the battle.

SIDNEY: Okay… okay… find it. Finish this.

But as she stumbled forward, a quiet rustling caught her ear. She turned, but it was too late. A facehugger launched itself from the shadows and latched onto her face. Her muffled screams echoed through the halls.

 

HOST CHECK-IN

 

Elvira lounged on her red couch, sipping a crimson cocktail. Randy Meeks, her co-host, stood with his face pale and his hands shaking.

RANDY: Someone needs to check on Sidney—NOW! The match is over, that thing should not still be on her!

Elvira was only half interested in Randy’s concern.

ELVIRA: Aww… I know she was your favorite, Randy. This must be a real tearjerker.

RANDY: This isn’t about that! Okay, it is a little about that, but she’s survived so much in her life, demented serial killers, multiple stab wounds, the Maniac Cop, Michael Myers! To get done in by an alien parasite. It’s just cruel!

Elvira shrugged.

ELVIRA: I’m sure she’ll be fine. Probably.

RANDY: THAT WAS NOT CONVINCING!

Elvira sighed.

ELVIRA: Okay, okay. We need to focus on our winner. Congratulations to Erin Harson! She’s our second finalist and gets a well-deserved break before her final showdown with Nancy Wheeler.

RANDY: Yay. Hooray. Great. But seriously, someone check Sidney’s chest cavity.

ELVIRA: Randy focus, it’s time to announce our final bonus match before the grand finale!

RANDY: Yeah sure. It is quite the doozy.

ELVIRA: You got that right. It involves two absolute stone-cold legends; Laurie Strode and Sarah Connor!

RANDY: A fantastic face-off. They’re the queens of not dying. These two don’t just survive—they endure. We’re talking decades of trauma, tactical skills, and more dead bodies in their rearview mirror than your average Friday the 13th sequel.

ELVIRA: Honestly, the title ‘Final Girl’ almost doesn’t apply to them anymore. Laurie’s been battling Michael Myers for decades. She is almost the slasher version of Batman.

RANDY: The same can be said for Sarah Connor. Final Girl doesn’t really fit her, and yet it does at the same time.  

ELVIRA: Ultimate protective mama bear. 

RANDY: It is for those reasons these two wily veterans couldn’t be placed into the tournament, but it felt almost sacrilegious to leave them out entirely.

ELVIRA: I wholeheartedly agree. 

RANDY: Over the decades, Laurie has developed a strong protective streak as more of her family falls into Michael’s crosshairs. Now both of these strong willed women will have a chance to flex those ‘protector’ muscles,  because in this challenge, they’ll each be in charge of a school bus filled with middle schoolers. Their mission? Keep those kids safe from The Creeper.

Elvira grinned.

ELVIRA: Ooooh! Is it that time again already? Twenty-seven years goes by so fast.

RANDY: Yep. The Creeper's cycle has ended, and he’s hungry again. For those not in the know—The Creeper is a demonic creature that awakens every 23rd spring for 23 days to feast on human body parts… which it uses to regenerate itself. Wings, eyes, lungs, whatever it eats, it becomes stronger. It chooses its victims by scent. It literally sniffs out fear and desire. Once it marks you, you're screwed.

ELVIRA:  It also drives a really creepy truck. That thing’s scarier than some horror movie slashers.

RANDY: Seriously! So, Laurie and Sarah will each take a bus of kids, and they’ll be driving through Creeper Country. Whoever can get their bus and all their kids to safety, will win.

ELVIRA: Or more likely at least a large percentage of their kids.

Randy reluctantly nodded. Elvira smiled darkly.

ELVIRA: Let’s find out what these two seasoned survivors have up their sleeves.

 

RURAL HIGHWAY - LATE AFTERNOON

 

Two long yellow school buses cruised down a dusty highway flanked by tall cornfields and skeletal trees. A storm brewed in the distance.

On one bus, Sarah Connor stood at the front, shotgun in hand. Her eyes scanned the road ahead. She addressed the kids.

SARAH: Stay calm. Listen to me, and nobody dies today.

On the other bus, Laurie Strode checked a revolver and looked into the rearview mirror, meeting the eyes of a frightened girl.

LAURIE: I’ve seen monsters before. I’ve beaten them. And I’m not letting any of them get to you.

Suddenly, a strange tune started playing from an old, dusty record player in the distance. As the buses passed a rusted roadside chapel, the haunting lyrics drifted through the air.

Jeepers Creepers… where’d you get those peepers?
Jeepers Creepers… where’d you get those eyes…

[Callisto]

Learn More About
Laurie Strode
Read more about Laurie Strode at Wikipedia
Official Site: Universal Studios Links: Wikipedia Horror Movies Wiki Best Horror Movies

Sarah Connor
Read more about Sarah Connor at Wikipedia
Official Site: TriStar Pictures/Sony Links: Wiki Entry - Sarah Connor IMDB Profile Wiki Entry - T2 (film)

[Boratz]

I'm leaning towards Sarah on this one

[Macklemore]

Sarah wins by margin of tactical superiority and offensive capability. Laurie survives, and her bus makes it close, but Sarah neutralizes the Creeper and delivers a larger number of kids alive.

[DSkillz]

Good set-up, Johnny. Haven't commented on your Final Girl arc 'cuz I feel like I'd need to watch more horror and horror-esque films and their sequels to be able to follow it properly. 

I feel like I'm at least decently familiar with these characters, though. Watched the first three Terminator movies, the first Jeepers Creepers film, and as of last fall, the first Halloween film. While I'm pretty sure Laurie took a level of badass since she first dealt with Michael Myers, Sarah's prep for Skynet warfare is just on another level. She's already better armed to deal with the Creeper per the set-up, and she will surely have more advanced tactics in mind than Strode to keep the kids on her bus safe.  

[Callisto]

Match Final Results

Member Ratings:
5.00 - Yazmal
5.00 - Boratz
4.70 - DSkillz
5.00 - Macklemore

FPA Calculation:
4 Total Votes cast
19.70 Total Combined Score
19.70 / 4 = 4.92 Final Rating on the match

MATCH SCORE
Laurie Strode: 0
Sarah Connor: 5